Finding Ground
A six-week online group for partners finding their way forward after betrayal
When you discover that the relationship you believed you had was not the relationship that existed, it can feel as though the ground has shifted beneath you.
Sleep changes. Eating changes. Your ability to focus disappears. You may find yourself checking, searching, replaying conversations, questioning what was real or wondering why you cannot simply pull yourself together.
These responses are not evidence that you are weak, unstable or handling this badly.
What happened to you has a name. It has a recognisable pattern, and understanding that pattern can help you begin to find your footing again.
Finding Ground is a six-week online course led by Dr Chris Samuels for partners who have experienced betrayal and want to better understand what is happening to them before making decisions about what comes next.
What Finding Ground Offers
Across six weeks, Chris will help you understand betrayal trauma, recognise the responses it can create and begin establishing a greater sense of safety and steadiness.
This is not about telling you whether to stay or leave.
It is not about asking you to forgive, move on or examine what you may have done differently.
It is about helping you understand what has happened to you so that, when you are ready to make decisions, those decisions belong to you rather than to the most painful and confusing period of your life.
What happens when we meet
90-minute online sessions
The group meets online for 90 minutes each week across six weeks, with no more than 20 participants.
A small, private cohort
Each session includes teaching from Chris, time for questions and an opportunity to connect in a small group with two or three other partners who understand something of what you are experiencing.
Small-group connection
For many participants, simply hearing someone else describe a thought, response or difficult moment they recognise can provide enormous relief.
You will not be required to speak during the sessions. Listening is enough, and you can decide when or whether you feel comfortable participating.
You can also choose whether to have your camera on. You might have it on from the beginning, turn it on later or leave it off for every session. All of those choices are completely acceptable.
If you would like to exchange contact details with another participant, you can. There is no expectation that you will do so.
Every participant agrees in writing not to share who attends the group or what is discussed during the sessions.
Only Chris’s teaching may be recorded. Participants will not appear in any recording, and small-group conversations will never be recorded.
You may use your first name or another name of your choosing during the sessions. Chris is the only person who needs to know your full identity.
The Six Weeks
Week One: What Happened to You
Week Three: Discovery and Disclosure
Week One: What Happened to You
Understand betrayal trauma as something that happened to you, rather than evidence that something is wrong with you. Learn why many of your responses are predictable and why understanding them can bring relief.
Week Two: The Investigating
Week Three: Discovery and Disclosure
Week One: What Happened to You
Explore why you keep searching, what the searching is trying to achieve and why it rarely provides the certainty or relief you are looking for.
Week Three: Discovery and Disclosure
Week Three: Discovery and Disclosure
Week Three: Discovery and Disclosure
Understand the difference between discovering information and receiving an honest disclosure. Learn what you are entitled to ask for and what you should not have to uncover alone.
Week Four: Safety in Your Own Home
Week Four: Safety in Your Own Home
Week Three: Discovery and Disclosure
Consider what emotional and practical safety might look like and why it involves more than promises or temporary changes in behaviour.
Week Five: Boundaries that Hold
Week Four: Safety in Your Own Home
Week Five: Boundaries that Hold
Learn the difference between a boundary based on what you will do and an attempt to control what someone else must do.
Week Six: The Deciding, Later
Week Four: Safety in Your Own Home
Week Five: Boundaries that Hold
Explore why you do not need to decide immediately whether to stay or leave, and what you may need to see and understand before that decision can genuinely be made.
What this group is, and what it is not
Finding Ground is an educational group course. Chris will teach, explain key concepts and answer questions that are relevant to the group as a whole.
It is not individual therapy or couples counselling. It is not designed to help you forgive your partner, persuade you to remain in your relationship or encourage you to leave.
The purpose is to help you become steadier and better informed so that any future decisions belong to you, rather than being made during one of the most painful and confusing periods of your life.
You will be asked to have your own therapist alongside the program, or to begin finding one within the first two weeks. If you do not currently have a therapist, Chris can help you identify an appropriate place to begin looking.
Program details
- Six weekly online sessions
- 90 minutes per session
- Proposed for Sunday evenings
- Beginning [START DATE REQUIRED FROM CHRIS]
- Time: [TIME AND TIME ZONE REQUIRED FROM CHRIS]
- Maximum of 20 participants
- Written materials provided each week
- Working price: $397 [CONFIRM WITH CHRIS]
- Payment arrangements: [CONFIRM WHETHER INSTALMENTS WILL BE OFFERED]
- Refund terms: [CONFIRM WITH CHRIS]
If cost is the obstacle
Two places in each group are available at no cost, with additional reduced-rate places available.
You only need to tell Chris that cost is preventing you from enrolling. You will not be asked to explain your financial circumstances or provide documentation.
Finding Ground may be appropriate if you want to understand betrayal trauma, feel less alone and become steadier before making major decisions about your relationship.
It is not the right program if you are seeking couples counselling, individual therapy or a decision about whether to stay or leave. If your partner is participating in a parallel program, you should attend a different Finding Ground group.
Finding Ground is not the right program if you are looking for couples counselling, individual therapy or someone to tell you whether to stay or leave.
If you are currently in crisis, unable to sleep or function, or having thoughts of harming yourself, individual care is more appropriate than a group course. In the United States, call or text 988 for immediate crisis support.
You do not need to speak until you feel ready, and you may choose not to speak during the program at all.
Listening, learning and recognising your own experiences in what others share are valid ways to participate. There is no expectation that everyone will engage in the same way.
Two places in each group are available at no cost, with additional reduced-rate places available.
You only need to tell Chris that cost is preventing you from enrolling. You will not be asked to explain your financial circumstances or provide documentation.
Before you pay for anything
Free support is available.
S-Anon and COSA provide free twelve-step meetings for partners and family members affected by another person’s compulsive sexual behaviour. Meetings are available online, by phone and in person.
SAMHSA’s National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357 provides free and confidential referrals to treatment and lower-cost support services. If you are in crisis, call or text 988.
Finding Ground is not better than these options. It is different. If a free meeting is the right place for you to begin, Chris would rather help you find that support than have you enrol in a program that is not right for you.
Choose your next step
Join Finding Ground
If you feel the program is right for you, secure your place in the next six-week group through Eventbrite.
Speak with Chris first
Not sure whether Finding Ground is the right support for you? Book a free 20-minute conversation with Chris to ask questions and find out whether the program is appropriate for you right now. Chris will tell you honestly if the program is not the right fit, or if another form of support would be more appropriate.
About Dr Christine Samuels
Chris Samuels, Ph.D.
Licensed Clinical Psychologist
Dr Chris Samuels is a licensed clinical psychologist with more than 30 years’ experience working with betrayal trauma and compulsive sexual behaviour.
She is the author of Should I Stay or Should I Go? Deciding Your Future After Betrayal and The 10 Things You Need to Know About Sexual Addiction.
Copyright © 2026 Dr Christine Samuels - All Rights Reserved.
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